Zibby Mag

By Zibby Owens

My husband’s mom and grandmother are but two casualties.

Tomorrow will be one year since my husband Kyle’s mom, Susan Felice Owens, died from Covid. Sixty-three years old. No pre-existing conditions. I took many of you along for the ride on Instagram as I posted daily about her illness, how she caught it from her mom, “Nene,” who also died of Covid just six weeks before her. Six weeks that Susan spent in three hospitals. Fighting.

(If you want to relive it, scroll back here.)

The outfit Susan’s wearing in the picture above is hanging in a closet in my basement right now, stuffed in with all her and Nene’s clothes as if they’re houseguests. Those shoes are in a pile on the closet floor. (Who knew she had so many shoes?!)

While I am just a bystander, grief-adjacent compared to Kyle and his sister, Stefanie, this anniversary has wrapped its claws around their hearts. It is excruciating to watch.

Ironically, one of my four kids has Covid now so we are in quarantine. Again. Masked at home. It never ends.

We are just one of so many families out there going through this. And Covid is just one of the arrows darting through hearts these days, with international and national news beyond heartbreaking. It can all feel too heavy to bear.

So I choose to focus on and often write or post about lighter fare. Books. Stories. Events. Podcasts. Friends. My dog, Nya, who we inherited from Susan last year.

But underneath, it’s all bubbling constantly, the top of the heavy pot rattling as steam threatens to topple it. I’m keeping my oven mitt on and pressing it down. But today I had to crack open the lid.

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Kyle’s sister, Stefanie, has kept their family crumb cake business alive. Visit Nene’s Treats on Goldbelly and consider indulging in one of Nene’s famous crumb cakes. A portion of all proceeds goes to Covid vaccine research at Mount Sinai Health System.